So I recently found out that I also have the diagnosis of schizoaffective disorder to add to my list. My doctor didn't tell me but I saw it written on the paper he filled out for the disability center at my university. I had heard of it but didn't really know what it was until I looked it up and I mean, I guess it fits. I've definitely had my fair share of delusions. Aliens, FEMA concentration camps, the ability to read people's minds, etc. It's been happening since fourth grade, along with the hallucinations. So I'm still not convinced of this diagnosis because it is new to me, so here's my story in brief, you tell me...
I moved in fourth grade. It was the most stressful thing that I could have ever imagined and let me to begin experiencing what I now realize was psychosis. I would scream and storm through the house crying and running from my dead rabbit that I thought was trying to kill me. I refused to sleep in my room (in the basement) because the demons were down there trying to posses me. This went on for two years and I don't know why my parents didn't do something, but they didn't. Around 6th grade I began to hear things, footsteps when I was home alone, heavy breathing next to me when I laid in bed, crying outside my window. I also got very, VERY paranoid that someone was watching me and that I was being followed. I would sit on the couch, facing all the doors, refusing to move when I was home alone with 911 dialed on my phone because I KNEW someone was going to break in and kill me. Anyways, 7th grade comes and I start getting depressed. Really depressed. I start self harming and by 8th grade I've also developed an eating disorder and polysubstance dependency. The breathing, footsteps, and cries have now turned to voices. Command voices, people talking to each other, talking to me, telling me how horrible of a person I am, etc. I get deeper into my depression. The depression switched on and off along with hypomania, the voices, delusions, and paranoia for the next three years depending on how compliant I was with my medication. This past year I experienced my first full blown mania episode and also got the diagnosis of Bipolar 1 Disorder. I don't really know where but I also accumulated the diagnosis of OCD, PTSD, GAD, and Borderline Personality Disorder along the way, but like I said, I'm giving the short story. Anyways...that's that...so idk, what do you guys think? Could it be schizoaffective? If so, how have you guys managed it in your lives?
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