I agree with Can'tExplain. I think this is probably something you both need to talk about.

Mrs. Webgoji and I together aren't interested. I'm not a naturally kinky guy so it's something I have to bring myself to do and is emotionally difficult. It's not upsetting, just exhausting emotionally. Mrs. Webgoji is more private. So for both of us a munch just wouldn't work.

But it sounds like you and your husband might be on different ends of the table on this. So I think some negotiation is in order. It doesn't have to be a fight or anything, but both of you need to negotiate with the idea of getting the other as much as you can.

For example, maybe you guys don't go to this munch, but participate in online discussions to make your husband more comfortable with the situation. Get to know the people that would go to a munch so you know what goes on. Then maybe actually attend with friends.

What I'm saying is that this sounds like a compromise situation where each could give a little.