I am ashamed to admit this. I don't really know where to go, except an anonymous forum. I feel really terrible.

Short story. I was very overweight. It sucked. I spent about 8 months working my *** off and dieting. Lost 45 pounds.

I jumped into the online dating game. I chatted up a girl who looked fantastic in her pics. We had a phone conversation and really hit it off. I invited her to a comedy club for some stand-up, and I told her we'd swing by a nearby bar for drinks after. I was really excited.

When I got there I discovered her pics were very old. She's gained probably 80 pounds or so. I didn't want to hurt her feelings. She really is a sweetie, even if she did mislead me. So we saw the show and then we went to the bar. I had too many drinks. Shame on me. She asked me if I wanted to come back to her place and smoke a bowl. I agreed.

That was Friday night. I didn't get home until Monday morning.

She wants to see me again tomorrow. I worked so hard to lose weight! I did it so I could have a shot with a slim, pretty girl for once in my rotten life. I feel so cheated. She's a wonderful girl, and if she looked like she did in the pics I'd be wild about her. I just can't do this.

I know I shouldn't have gone home with her. I shouldn't have planned such an elaborate first date. I should have done a low-key lunch date or something like I normally do and spent an hour or two with her, and we could have gone our separate ways without any hurt feelings.

I don't want to hurt her. I think it would be wrong of me to see her tomorrow. I have anxiety and depression issues, and the thought of calling her after work today to break things off is really driving me crazy. I don't know what to do or how to do it.