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I flipped on him. Yelled at him that I was not that! I wanted him to decribe how I fit that diagnosis. I think he got so nervous and could not think because he fumbled looking for that DMS diagnosis book. I snapped at him that he was not allowed to look at the book that he had to use his training and experience to explain to me why he came to that conclusion. All he just kept saying was "It is just fear of abandoment. I don't know why you are so upset. Most people are happy when they are told what they have." It cause such a rift between us for months.
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When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors.
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