Hi all,

This has been paining me for a while so i decided to write here and get your thoughts. Sorry for the lengthy post, i just wanted to be thorough and give you as much information as i can.

Here it goes...
I met this girl one night in late march. She had just broken up with her boyfriend and was crying and i took her home, we talked and slept together. Since then we saw either other about one or twice a week on a casual basis for 3 months. Slept together every time, and she seemed genuinely into me. She would bring wine every time we got together, treat us to dinner, and even offered and did my laundry. Sex was amazing too. I slowly started falling for her but also had my guard up because she would be on her phone a lot and often act weird (sleep on the sofa, leave in the morning after we spent the night).

On our 3rd month of knowing each other i had the talk asked her if she wanted to cement our relationship and be committed. she said its ok if i talk to other girls. i got mad and asked her what does that mean and if kissing or sleeping is ok to her. then i told her in very strong tone that that would not be ok with me. She said thats ok, and that i could if i felt i needed that. Later on the way home she started crying and said she still hasn't fully gotten over issues with her ex.

That weekend, we had plans to get together sat night and i said i'm going to a friends bday party (didn't invite her). she said ok i'll make other plans. That night as i was out i saw her walking with another guy. i confronter her (buzzed), she said she was sober and the DD to her friends and she's driving them home. i asked if she's coming back and she said probably not. I was devastated as i saw her walk away.

The next day she called me, came over, we talked she apologized said she felt sick about it and we cemented our bf/gf status. That was the end of june.

We started to get closer, went on trips, and she told me she's falling for me. In august one night i felt we were a little off, and checked her phone, something i've never done before despite my suspicions. I found out that she has been texting/talking to her ex almost every day. While recent conversations it was very mundane, going back to jun/july it was sexual in nature. I woke her up confronted her, and asked her if she had anything to confess, she said no. i called her a lier and kicked her out. she came back crying but i told her i didn't want to talk to her. she tried to reach out throughout the weekend but i ignored her.

We talked on the phone couple days later, almost as a breakup talk. she apologized for everything and repeatedly said she did not cheat on me. i told her her ex was using her and she should stop communicating with him for her sake and she said she would. we met the next day for me to pick up my stuff and we had a long talk on the couch. i asked her to confess to everything that had transpired until now. she was reluctant but i told her this is all or nothing. She told me she had met with a guy she used to date during our first month of knowing each other, got drunk and slept with him.. but did not sleep with him the night i saw her walking with him. She said she drove him they talked and that was it. She also confenced that the infamous ex came over early in may and they slept together as well. She said she thought i was seeing other people at the time.

She also said she was naked facetiming that ex from time to time until she ended that in august. They were still talking platonically though. She said she was in love with him for the longest time (she had 3 bfs since then and maintained touch with him throughout all that time). and at the beginning when we met she was lost, didn't have a job, and thought about moving away from the city so she was not sure what was gonna happen with her or her life. She said she didn't think the facetiming was cheating because it wasn't physical, and confessed she was doing it while in a relationship with past boyfriends. She said that what she thought relationships were supposed to be like until she met me, and i believe her. She said she sees now how wrong it was and cant say sorry enough and that it will never happen now.

It was the hardest thing i ever had to hear.... she said none of this has been happening for months now. We had sex.. feww days later we started to see each other again and talk a lot. she wanted to make it work. She told me she told him she doesn't want to talk with him anymore, and blocked his number. We've talked every day.. serious tough talks abotu what had happened. We said "i love you" together shortly after that and she did something with me she's never done with anyone before.

we wrote "trust rules" that include not communicating with any exes, complete access to phone email etc. which she completely agreed to. she even got a droid (like me) to leave the iphone stuff in the past.

We are in the best place we've even been, talking all the time, spending every night together, saying i love you, she takes care of my every need and really seems to trying to make it work. She said that she realized what i meant for her that night after we broke up when we talked and we both confessed about our past. She agreed to talk to a couples therapist together and do what it takes to make it right. She keeps saying that none of the past stuff will ever happen again, that she's different now, thanks to me and what she's learned about relationships ( she had a bad experience in college, and in relationships before).

I should note that i wasn't perfect either, but not to that extent. Also, after everything came out i did call her a disgusting *****, which i regret saying.

It's been two months now of us spending every day together, almost perfectly. every time i seem upset she will ask to talk (even though she feels very uncomfortable with it) and willing to do anything that will help reduce the triggers i get. She told me she believes i'm the one for her (with her reasons), and loves me more than anything (she wasn't like that before

So we've been at it like that for 2 months now. We have plans to celebrate our december birthdays and booked our first real vacation to PR together.

Now... i love what we have and i love her and where we are. she said she's even being standoffish to guy co-workers to not be emotionally attached to anyone else but me. (she used to be very flirty before). I look at her phone records online every so often and she talks to no other guys.

We are great now and she's doing everything right but the past still haunts me. I don't know what i should do?? it makes me upset every time i think that i was falling for her and she was cavalier with my emotions and invested in her ex. But on the other hand she chose me over everyone and has never cut off talking with her exes and she has with me. She keep saying i am everything to her now. I do love her and want to give it a second chance especially since it feels different. But i often wonder if there's more she's not telling me but how do i forgive and forget the past? Should i?