I'm glad it helped! I think it's hard for everyone... I know it's still sometimes hard for me to remember, but I had a therapist (who actually worked by email) a long time ago that really got me to understand that.

He used to tell a story of how... he might be standing in the middle of a restaurant, and some strange woman would run through and scream "wow! You're totally nuts! You're awful and horrible and crazy and don't know anything!" and run off.

His point was - he knows that he's not any of those things, so he'd assume that *she* was crazy or had some sort of issues. (Versus me at the time - I'd assume I did SOMETHING to make her say that stuff, that she had SOME sort of valid complaint!)

I think it's a good thing to learn, even though sometimes it's still hard to remember!