I read some on dulutional thoughts and it's not exactly what I am experiencing. I am not thinking that my imagined thoughts are real. I know they are not real and that is what causes the freak out. I know a situation didn't go the way I am imanining so why am I thinking of these things. So I will correct my thought by saying "it didn't happen that way" and my thoughts will just go on to another situation and again imagine some other ending to an event. And it always go into something filled with anger and violence. I know it didn't happen but I imagine it going that way. Right now I am ok. But when that happens I get stuck in it and it brings a lot of darkness with it.