Thanks everyone, I feel better even coming here. I also will look into the free school counseling at the health center.

Right now we are on a break for thanksgiving, we have a week off this year which is really weird, normally it is only two days.

I am so glad someone suggested to just accept the C. I need to learn to do that, my GPA is 3.92 and so I feel stressed about it dropping but I really need to let go of it I am not my grades.

I need to work on my own issues of pain.

The thing is I am not a young student but rather an old student who returned to school after raising my kids alone. They are grown now and I kept losing jobs so decided to go back to school.

I wanted straight A's because I am poor and then I could apply for scholarships.

When everyone started dying I felt real shock and sad but then I poured myself into school and it helped me not think about it.

I really don't know why I had the meltdown it was just the way he talked to me, and his relentless attitude about perfection.

There was a girl student who has cancer and she missed one of his tests because she had to have chemo and he wouldn't let her retake the test, she ended up having to take a Withdraw from his class.

Then he failed like a handful of students for the course because they didn't cite properly on their papers.

I managed to make the cut but when I got my C grade I just cried, I don't know why.

The binge felt like I was out of control, it felt like I just couldn't get enough food and afterword I was so sick and I didn't want to throw up so I rationalized eating laxatives is less unhealthy.

I am so glad all of you replied, I am so grateful, honestly it makes me feel like there are good caring people in the world and I just can't even convey how much that means to me.

So Thank you everyone !