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Originally Posted by Shadix
I used to get on GWS back in 2008 or so. I would mainly just be asking questions about women's dating preferences and the way things work in the dating scene. I would ask there because I would get more answers than on singles and dating.
Anyhow, I have to disagree with your assessment of Elliot Rodger. People have been so quick to blame it all on "misogyny" and the "men's rights movement", but the fact is, men who follow those ideologies and hate women generally don't go out and kill people. Furthermore, there have been a bunch of shooting incidents like this(there was just one at FSU a couple nights ago) and there is no tendency for these shooters to be part of any anti-women group. Yes, some men out there are woman-haters and that is unfortunate. There are just as many women who are man-haters. But the issue of shooting rampages has little to do with the misogyny or misandry.
Yes, I totally agree that Aspergers does not cause someone to go out and shoot people and that it cannot be blamed for what happened. But if people wish to understand why he and so many other men are so angry and bitter, I think Aspergers and the issues it causes probably have a lot to do with it. Most people do not understand Aspergers pretty well and it is probably under-diagnosed. I was never diagnosed, but I am pretty certain that I fall somewhere on the spectrum. One thing that almost all people with Aspergers share in common is that they have trouble relating and connecting to other people socially. Now, if the person matches the stereotypical Aspie archetype that most people believe all Aspies to be like (Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory, Abed from Community, etc.) then this wouldn't be such a huge problem, because this type of person has no desires or ambitions that would require social success in order to achieve. But the fact is, this is NOT how most Aspies are. One thing I have heard before is "most Aspies have no interest in dating". This is absolute ********. Just because an Aspie man has little interest in relationships or social interactions with women, it does NOT mean he isn't romantically or sexually interested in women. Most Aspies DO get crushes and DO "want" girls. But as you can imagine, the dating scene is not very Aspie-friendly, particularly for males. The social convention is that the male is generally required to court the female and in a way that required a certain level of social skill. For example, it is not acceptable for a guy to go up to a girl and straight up tell her he's interested in her or even make it obvious. The guy is required to basically have an excuse. For an Aspie who likely has little interest in social chitchat and has trouble connecting socially, this may will be very difficult, if not impossible.
Anyways, my point is, the struggles that people with Aspergers deal with are very real. I am pretty certain that it is these struggles which lead many men to become angry and hateful and in some cases blame women for their plight. Many have seemed to be suggest that the root of the problem is misogyny. It is almost like they are suggesting that the solution is rounding up all the misogynists and locking them up or something. I seriously saw a petition shortly after this incident suggesting that the government should label the "men's rights movement" as a terrorist group. I can't stress enough how dumb that is. It really seems to me like these people are just trying to use the incident for propaganda purposes and have little interest in actually finding a solution.
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MGTOW was not a part of the Men’s Rights movement. Even though I would argue most of guys that claimed to be MRAs on the Gender Studies section were very bitter men that need to get out of their bedrooms every once and a while and live in the real world before they make assessments about the entire female population I remember a number of them were trying to distance themselves from the MGTOW too because they were vile. These were guys that often made rape jokes, posted pictures of women that had been badly beaten up by men and encouraged other men that the best way to keep a woman was to “punch her in the mouth a few times and keep her in check”’ Some of them like Axel wrote about their fantasies of killing women in graphic details and would post questions like if it was alright to hold a gun to a woman’s friend’s head and force her to have sex with him if the gun wasn’t loaded.
Most of the hatred Elliott had for women was ‘supposedly’ because he couldn’t get a girl to date him but this was actually not true and he often ranted about one girl I believe was among his victims that asked him out and he turned her down because she was overweight and after she had lost weight he asked her out and she turned him down. This enraged him and he believed she humiliated him and if it wasn’t for him she wouldn’t have lost weight and he also believed she had told other girls all these embarrassing things made them avoid him. He complained about similar experiences with other girls and went on to claim because he was a ‘nice guy’ the only girls that would sleep with him were “ugly used up *****s” and all the girls he wanted to have sex with “used him when their abusive and jerk boyfriends cheated on them and they would go back to other guys that did it to them again because they were brainwashed by feminism.”
Elliott’s definition of ugly was basically any girl that didn’t fit a certain stereotype of women and if he hadn’t been so shallow and sexist he could have had a girlfriend but he only wanted to date the ones that looked like models or porn stars and wouldn’t date normal women like most men and therefore was ultimately responsible for himself being single in the end. I don’t believe Elliott having Aspergers Syndrome was to blame for his lack of success in the dating world either. According to recent reports Elliott Rodger was never officially diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome or having any form of Autism
For that matter and most of his characteristics were deemed uncommon amongst the spectrum and had more in common with a Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Many experts in the field have gone on record stating the obvious that “autistic people are far less likely than non-autistic people to engage in criminal activity of any kind especially violence” but due to false reports at the time of his arrest the media jumped on it.
I have Asperger’s Syndrome, ADHD and OCD and I am married and my Wife wasn’t my first girlfriend and while I will admit I had some trouble dating after my first girlfriend passed away and there was a time when I thought I would never find another woman that would accept me for having disabilities like she did because a lot of the women I liked that were willing to date me didn’t want anything to do with me after they found out about them and the women that did were married I have come to find there are a lot of women that will and aren’t discriminative against people with disabilities and I know a number of other men and women with disabilities that are in relationships.