Finally admitted this week at psych appt. that I'm really not doing well, and haven't been for quite some time. (Additionally, for more than 3 weeks now I've had severe physical pain which has SO not helped matters.) Been trying hard to hide it. We're trying some med adjustments. It was my thought patterns that finally made me admit how bad it is. Answered some hard questions honestly. That's a pretty big deal, because I'm very, very guarded and well-practiced at dodging and minimizing. Having recently (re-)realized that not opening up more is doing myself a real disservice helped with that. Even so, there's a major thing that I still just… can't.