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Hi sorand0m-- I'm sorry you're having such a tough time right now. Remember you inability to finish projects has nothing to do with your intelligence. It is a product of your mental illness. When I've been hypomanic I've started dozens of projects which, if I could have seen things clearly, I would have had to admit I would never finish. As for the self-medicating, I would suggest trying to find an AA-type meeting in your area. You don't have to stand up and call yourself an alcoholic to attend one, but it sounds as if you really do need some support to stop the self-medicating. As I'm sure you're aware, the self-medicating doubly sabotages you. There are the deleterious effects of whatever drug you're using, and then there's the fact that the drugs' effects sabotage the efficacy of whatever prescribed meds you're supposed to be taking.
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Dx Bipolar II 2014 -- currently in remission
Stay calm, be kind, have hope, love lots, and be well.
"Listen to the deep voice of your soul. Do not be distracted by the voice of your mind." -- Caitlin Matthews[/B][/COLOR][/SIZE]
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