I see what you're saying, Jordy. For you, going along with what you're asked to do is a way to protect yourself, except that it actually does the opposite--it harms you. The trick is to find a No that gives you more safety than being silent and going along with what's asked. It has to be a No to something that's clearly more dangerous than being silent. Even just imagining it will give you practice. The challenge is to think of what would be worse than what your abuser can do so that, in your head, you can imagine saying no to that thing.