Quote:
Originally Posted by ParisMama
I've seen some interesting stuff in some of the positive psychology / happiness work that might be a helpful starting point.
One of the areas that apparently helps grow happiness (so not exactly self esteem per se, but probably relatively close) is accomplishing goals.
Are there things you have accomplished in life? Things you're working towards now?
This topic is really important to me right now, I'm in my mid-40s and I've kind of determined that self-love/self-esteem/self-acceptance is maybe my biggest challenge, the thing that's holding me back in many areas of my life.
I started working on this a bit earlier this year, working through Brene Brown's first book "I Thought It Was Just Me But It's Not". I was doing it alone, in a journal, and ended up dropping the project because I had a different big project that suddenly needed my attention (plus, the work was HARD!) but now I'm ready to go back to it.
And this time I think I'm going to do some of my work online so I can have some accountability for my process (& keep moving forward instead of finding excuses for why I can't) - perhaps I'll do that here on this forum, perhaps a blog... Unsure right now, but I'll likely get started back with this book in a few weeks.
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^^ This is really good advice. I would add that you should pick goals that can't be contaminated by someone else.
For example, I used to set writing goals with the idea that I would reward myself for accomplishing them. Nobody cared if I accomplished the goal and actually demeaned me for rewarding myself.
So when I get a power cable for my computer I'll be going about it all together different. If anyone wants to read my books ... they'll have to get them like everyone else. Online. I'm not going to include friends or family in my writing so they can't contaminate it. "Y'all pee'd in the pool! So everybody out!"
So pick a goal that nobody can pick apart and then go get it!