*Carrie claps her hands* There you go, you did it. You made the first step without even trying. To be distracted long enough that the impulse doesn't get carried out. Sure it may have been luck this time but maybe next time you will be able to draw in this lucky success.

As far as seeking sexual abuse I do this as well. Sometimes, I am ashamed to admit but am trying to get over the shame so I can face it straight on, I do it to myself. Sometimes I encourage my husband to do it too me. He thinks it is just fun and games but to me it is fulfilling something else. I am lucky I suppose that I have such a willing partner which makes it posible for me not to seek it elsewhere.
Carrie

<font color=green>Not knowing when the dawn will come, I open every door.--Emily Dickenson