Wow thank you so much for all your honest answers.

@ stbguy wow our stories sounds so much alike!
That must be really horrible that she treats you like that. I think that she just couldn't handle it and did not know how to react.. Have you ever talked to someone in your real life about this?

@bebrave483 it's okay! it's great to tell your own story. Never expected that this was a problem that other people have too. now i'm so curious who this guy is haha! It's so hard not to feed it right? It hurts you but it also feels good.. tough stuff..

@wantwhaticanthave that must be really hard for you, especially because you have a husband too. it's really hard right? have you ever talked about this to someone in your real life? x

@empresseugenie1982 hi! 11 years are a long time, must be really hard for you. but is it over now? so yes, that is really great! how did you do that?

-- I think we should stop emailing each other. Because those emails are my life and it feeds the obsession. But then it feels like i lost her completely. And i love it so much to hear what's she's doing in life. but when I go on further this way, I'll be still obsessed when I am 80.
I try to bring some positive thoughts out of the whole situation. There are so many million people in the world, and I'm one of the lucky few that had her in my life for a couple of years. If I made one different step in life, like going to another school, I wouldn't know that she even exists! I'm happy that she brought so much joy in my life. I'm sorry for my crappy english though, i'm tired and got just home from a long day of work