I think it would help to see a Dynamic Relationship kind of therapist and go into the work of loss and grieving in your whole life. Your problems didn't start with the birth of your son, but were definately worsened by your fragility and having to give him up. Grief is so hard to bear, especially the way you have had it so near for so long.

But I just think that trying to run ahead of grief all the time by just trying "to have a nice attitude" and just taking meds, is keeping you from learning how to manage it on a better level. A good therapist will help gain strengths and help you not to be overwhelmed at the same time. I would definately look into that as a way to go.