I have an aunt that has been disabled due to a birth defect. She had a daughter who is now of legal age. They have lived off of state assistance though have come into alot of money which they have sqaundered away.

My Grandpa has paid for the cousin to go through CNA training which she never took the test for. A couple of other vocation training courses which she never followed through on.

He also takes her on her weekly or even biweekly trips to the ER. This girl had the chance that he mother never had, to lead a normal healthy life but she wants to be sick for attention.

The latest is that she has said that the Dr told her she has a chromosomal birth defect that in short says she should have been born a man. She also says they are giving her testosterone. She is of legal age now so we can not get ahold of her records and her mom is understandibly freaking out. The girl has shaved her head and planning on going to S. Carolina to meet a 35 yo man she met online.

I am sure she has munchhausen but not sure whether to approach her mother or my grandfather. She needs help and I need to stop being approached "to help the poor girl" I am giving them no more money or assistance. They in no way have tried to help themselves.

What is the best way to approach this?