No that's not it every time I watch the movie I cry I wasn't in shock or anything I mean what I'm saying is that I'm completely unemotional when something happens to someone one who is supposedly close to me but I can get very emotional when something happens in a book or movie that I see I mean there have been cases where family members have died and I haven't felt anything. I'm not even sure if I love my mother at all I have animosity built up towards her and I don't know why she hasn't done anything to me.