Here's the thing, you have enough stuff going on that consulting with a psychotherapist could be really helpful. What you describe as friends thinking you are mean and you not remembering sounds like the amnesia associated with parts/alters, for sure. And a lot of times, the person who goes to therapy and comes out with a DID diagnosis can be totally in the dark about what all has been going on. That's kind of the point of the condition; to protect a functional self from information and feelings that would derail functionality. It's too complicated and difficult to deal with without help IMHO.