After a conversation with my pdoc ( a month or so ago) I was told he wasn't convinced that I've ever been psychotic, because I don't have a schizophreniform disorder. That's fine and all, but I just don't know what to describe these experiences when I start to lose control and my thought processes divulge and go somewhere else. The voices ease on the medication. Why are they even giving me medication antipsychotics when they don't believe I'm psychotic. I'm on two bloody ap's, what are they for? They clopixol helps the voices a little bit while the chlorpromazine helps with the anxiety and the voices. It's like I can distract myself easier from ideas I have when I'm on those meds.

I'd be surprised if many of you (people without a diagnosis of scz) asked about your so called psychotic experiences to your doctors that you'd probably get the same answer I got. They told me and held me in hospital because I was psychotic, that's why they could detain me. I even have the patient notification form with 'psychosis and further clinical assessment' but yet they tell me I'm not psychotic and have never been psychotic.

I think there is something 'funny' going on I really do I don't own my own thoughts, my brain has been fried from a non invasive lobotomy of some sorts. I'm incapable of independent thought
This leaves me restless and anxious and when those two combine, get together we're going to have wars, deadly ****ing wars about all types of things that could happen souly in the mind of a terrorist ME!! I am a terrorist to myself to my brain they make it that way, they make it comfortable for their inhabitance.

I would be surprised, I would, if all your diagnosis where wrong. Who goes through doctors getting the same diagnosis and then finds one who gives the diagnosis the patient wants and where do they go then, they're happy. All the others were wrong. Why does this exist in the right context. I was told I took it out of context.
I was doing ok there for a while but I can feel it all coming down again.