I've been fighting depression for about 2 years now. I've had my ups and downs. But as of late i've been really down. And i'm graduating high school and our schools prom is this thursday. I mean i should be excited right . I've hated high school all four years and now its finally over and the most i can do is shrug my shoulder. I want to be happy, i want to be excited about prom, i wanna go and enjoy myself with my friends. I don't want to feel numb. But thats i feel. Just numb.
Everyone always says oh don't worry it will get better. But i'm just so sick. Sometimes i wish i could just get in my car and drive away. I've been thinking about that a lot lately. The rational part of my brain knows better though. Yet i'm yearning to go home to arkansas. To be in my mountains again. To fdrive back home and to never look back. I keep telling myself its only 4 more years you just have four more years of college left to go then you can leave. But its not passing fast enough. I can't be excited about graduating when i'll i can do is be home sick.