I lost my significant other due to the angry behavior from my Borderline Personality Disorder. I have just begun getting treatment and have fully accepted my BPD.
Now I am looking back without the anger and realize what she went through and feel such blame, guilt and regret. I just lost the best woman I've ever had in my life. The resulting damages from my angry behavior (NOT Physical) are so bad that there is legal measures to prevent our speaking. Needless to say..no hope for a reconciliation.

Any suggestions for dealing with my current "awakening" in realizing all the damages I caused and the relationship lost from my angry behavior?

Thank you for reading.