Boy I dunno. There are three of them in my family but not to the degree you are talking about. It's funny because my sister just gave my Mom a book on Narcissistic Personality Disorder. My mom was reading some of it to me and then I looked up the symptoms. What you describe sounds classic. My dad has some of them. There are actually only two to deal with now because my sister divorced her husband who I think would definitely meet all the criteria for a diagnosis. They have kids though so we have to deal with him to a certain degree. My sister in law just can't resist getting her opinion in every time on what you are doing is wrong and how she would do it with an air of superiority. All of them are very controlling. My dad has to be the center of attention and if you ignore him he gets pissed and pulls the silent treatment so then there is this tension in the air and my siblings get triggered from when we were kids and he was an active alcoholic. None of it bothers me to much because I have spent so many years in Alanon learning to "Detach With Love". Not to get emotionally enmeshed in other peoples issues. That's what I would suggest is to detach with love. Don't let it effect you. He probably didn't have the greatest childhood and it helps to look at it as if they have a dysfunctional relationship and they can't help it. Not feeling superior or judging but just that people have problems they really can't help and I am powerless to do anything about them. Once I realize I am basically powerless over the actions of others it makes it easier to detach with love. It takes practice and a lot of processing like you are doing here before you get there.

I hope your sister will force him to get some help. She can't make him but she can leave him if he doesn't. My sister did because he was just so emotionally abusive and didn't see anything wrong with himself. I feel for the kids. If he drinks a lot then that really complicates things.

Welcome to PC btw.