Hi lucami. sorry you are having a tough time of it.

You sound like professional help would be advisable if that is possible in your area, such as psychiatrist to prescribe medicine or a therapist to talk things through.

The only things that haunts us are our own fears, anxieties and memories. None of these are a power over us.

A friend tells me that doing something is one way of taking the focus off themselves. Not doing things is almost like self-imposed isolation. So they set small goals: Picking up the dirty laundry. Washing the dishes. Sweeping the floor. It also boosts self esteem. It also makes people we live with like us better. It works for them.