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Dec 02, 2014, 11:34 PM
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Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: vancouver
Posts: 18
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I am new to this site and trying to figure everything out.
Since I was a young teen I have suffered from depression, and some where down the line I started have anxiety, not long after panic attacks. I had my first attempt when I was 15.
I have been on and off meds since I was a teen, many made me zombie like and one I was on for two years made me completely numb, no feelings whatsoever.
I live far from my family (five hour flight), all my friends are married, with kids or kids on the way. Some of them I can talk to, others it is always the quick answer "get over it". I often feel guilty and a burden to those I care the most about, which is why I rarely share with others.
There are days I don't want to get out of bed all I want to do is sleep. I don't want to leave the couch or the apartment for days.
Being able to be social is always a 50/50 chance. I get a lot of anxiety for meeting new people or being in crowds.
Recently had a breakup (lasted six months), made me feel terrible, everything was my fault, however I miss him very much.
I feel so alone, like I have no one. I have a lot of troubles focusing at work, I basically feel like I am falling apart. I cry a lot, often at work. I am tired. Living life waiting to die.
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