While Bill has just won the contest for the most succinct yet complete response , I want to point out that SHE might have the same reservations, fears, insecurities, and issues with being self-conscious as YOU. Or might not. That you will find out. But don't assume. I mean - you have read the forums a lot, and although they are not a slice of reality because the posters have MH issues, they are still pretty much about life in general. Anxiety in the US hits 18% of the population so MH is not some sort of a narrow niche. Plus, many people with mental illness have the same issues as those without dx qualitatively; the only difference is quantitative (they suffer more, function less, etc.)

So you have read the forums and know how many people have insecurities, are self-conscious, doubt themselves, overthink and overanalyze, feel vulnerable and exposed, wonder if they are good enough, ETC. A lot. You have read A LOT about this.

It then follows that this young woman also with a substantial likelihood has some issues.

A person can think that only she feels exposed, self-conscious, vulnerable, and, fears rejection, but is it really logically possible that only she feels this way and everybody else is a super hero of assertiveness, high self esteem or what not? It is not possible - just as a whopping 18% are afflicted with anxiety, so (the percentage might differ) a lot of people are afflicted with self-doubt, fear of rejection, and the whole 9 yards.

I am writing this because I hope, and I wish the very best for you as we all do on here since we have watched you grow tremendously in the face of very serious challenges, that you would take this view because it would help you connect with her better.

If you view her as a fellow human who also deals with issues, it would be easier to connect with her as with an equal (a friend or a lover eventually does not matter - an equal); if you view her as a judge who may find you not good enough and who will decide if there is anything good in you for her, then your relationship would from the get-go not be one of equals. It would be your seeking her approval. Not so good. Human-to-human much, much better!