Hello again dyingforjossee18: I'm not intentionally following you around! I just happened on your 2 posts. I saw that no one had yet replied, so I thought I'd take a stab at them, so to speak.

I don't know what your secret snuggle sessions after you clock out are all about. But, assuming it's with the kids, it may well be inappropriate for you to be doing this without the knowledge & permission of whoever is in charge. I won't get into the various ways in which this could potentially be problematic. But there are, I assure you, several of them that come to mind right off the top of my head. Should your co-worker have told on you? Well... that's another issue. But it may be that, in fact, she did you a favor. This is probably not what you wanted to read as a reply. But it is my honest perspective based on what I understand the situation to be.

As far as her being horrible to the kids & trying to make them upset, this of course is bothersome. Under other circumstances this is something you might want to take to whoever is in charge. However, as things stand now, it's likely this would be seen as retaliation. And also this is not what you're looking to do anyway, as I read your post. You want suggestions for how to get along with her so you don't have to quit your job. (By the way, I think that's great!)

First of all I would suggest that you try not to hold it against her that she reported your snuggle sessions. Whether you agree with what she did or not, she was in a difficult position & presumably did what she thought was correct. Second, I would try to analyze why it is she's being horrible to the kids & trying to make them upset. What's happening when she does this. Can you discern a pattern? Perhaps she has difficulty handling stress & the kids raise her anxiety level so she does things to try to informally punish them for it. I think sometimes those of us who struggle with mental health problems ourselves tend to forget that the people around us can also have their own mental health challenges, whether or not they are in treatment for them.

Anyway, if you can discern a pattern to what is happening when this teacher does what she does, perhaps you can figure of some ways of helping to keep the situation from developing in the first place. I know that's a pretty tall order. But, other than just living with it or quitting your job, something of this sort may be your only option. Understand that this teacher has her own stresses & problems in her life, just as we all do, & see if you can figure out some ways to be helpful. What would you do if she were a friend of yours? Do that for her & perhaps it can make a difference. My best wishes to you.

P.S. Oh... and my compliments with regard to your desire to make this work!