Kind of sad. Our neighbor died. We live in a duplex. Tonight, the police knocked on our door, asking when we had last seen him (doing a welfare check). It had been a couple of days, which, in and of itself was not unusual. But we just knew right away that it wasn't going to be ok. It was the day we knew was coming, and that it would be sooner than later. He was in very poor health, very heavy and altogether unhealthy lifestyle. So not exactly a shock. Still.

We were not buddy buddy, but got along just fine. He worked nights and we're night owls. It was almost like having our own little house. Music at 3 am? No problem.

Two things gnaw. Just a few nights ago, we were talking about what an ideal neighbor he was for us. I thought to myself that, the next time I saw him, I was going to make a point of telling him we really like having him as our neighbor. That didn't happen. Carpe diem, people… The other thing is this. It was not unusual to hear him having coughing fits (chain smoker). But the other night, I heard another sound. It disconcerted me. I realize now it was the last sound heard from the other side of the wall. And that I was the only person who heard it. Yeah.

That's kind of haunting. (Though, TG, without the burden of guilt for reasons too numerous/complicated to go into here.)

We helped the officials with the (very) limited amount of info we could. It was raining and cold, but I felt compelled to stay outside. Respects or something. I barely ever drink at all anymore. But when the wheeled him out, I said a silent goodbye and raised my cup.

It's just kind of sad.
(Mood-wise I've been in good shape for a few days now. This doesn't change that. It's just a sombre thing.)