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Originally Posted by StbGuy
Why is it that I can see the pain, struggles and situations of others, especially on PC, and feel such deep empathy and sorrow for them? And, wish so much that the person gets help, and know that they deserve help. Why is it that I can see the person is a deserving person and needs love and attention, why all of this, and then I can't, for the life of me, see that I need these things too to make me healthy again? When it comes to me, every chance or suggestion of help I turn down and I just say I'll think about it. I never do, I just forget about it.
I can identify so much with what others are saying who have depression and I can immediately see how much they are hurting. Then, when I try to have compassion for myself, it all just fades and I think I deserve everything that is happening to me. I don't seek help and I don't allow anyone to help me. Why have I turned on myself, the one person who needs me the most?
Does anyone else ever feel this way?
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STBguy: I feel this way on a daily basis. I am always the first person to help, lend a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on and from what many have told me great advise. Personally I really don't know what is wrong with myself and why I don't think I deserve the same in return. My counselor is trying to teach me how to love myself again, but I cant seem to make this work.
At the age of 15 I had my first attempt, she asked me if I could go back and tell that girl something what would I tell her, my response "Pills wont work" I think she was looking for an answer much like I would tell others, everything will be ok, this is just a temporary situation and things will get better you just have to believe this. However for me, I don't think I deserve to be happy, I actually go to sleep each night fingers crossed I will not wake in the morning.