Welcome to Psych Central Kingofpain. I am sorry to hear you are suffering from the affects of abuse.
Your dad may have been a smart man, but he sounds very ignorant of who people are. You are NOT a nobody. You are you and we need you. Your dreams are sleeping waiting for you to wake them up.
you said:
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I just, don't know what else to do.
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Why come on down to PC and post and read posts and make friends over time. This is a new beginning if you want it. We welcome you. Make yourself at home.