Hi everyone,

i have just signed up as i want to gain insight into bipolar disorder while i am waiting for an assessment/diagnosis. My GP thinks i am bipolar but i dont know if i agree. I experienced about a month of pure happiness (despite being on anti depressants) and elation, i wanted to speak to everyone and anyone, i laughed all the time, constantly made jokes, wanting to start up exercising and eating healthy and felt motivated, while also going on loads of dates (unlike me!) and being really carefree and telling them too much information about my life. I had amazing self esteem, i felt like i was IT! pretty, confident, clever etc. but i usually have low self esteem so it was strange. I also spent nearly all of my student finance going out and drinking and online shopping leaving nothing left for bills! at the time i didnt care. so as i say this went on for about a month maybe a bit longer. then ive had 2 months of utter depression and suicidal thoughts, not wanting to see anyone or do anything, with a few 'neutral' or 'fine' days in between. but thats it, i havent experienced any more of the 'high' days since, just that 1 or 2 months. I thought people with bipolar generally experienced a lot more mood switching? Or is it different with each person? also to add, in the past 3 weeks i have out of nowhere developed awful anxiety. im constantly worrying and feel nervous and fearful for no reason, and any little noise makes me have a mini panic attack! i closed the door behind me today and it blew a bit of paper and i nearly fell over with fear! i also stepped on a lighter and screamed! what is with that? i cant sleep at night because i worry so much as feel uneasy. so its like ive had 4 different moods, high moods, depression, anxiety and neutral. any one else experience anything like this? and does it sound like bipolar? obviously not expecting any sort of diagnosis just an insight really or any advice. i have been waiting 3 weeks to see someone since being referred. sorry if none of this makes sense my head is a bit muffled!

thanks for reading