i am sorry you are having such difficulty. fortunately i am not there yet, but i do understand where you are coming from. work is still a safe place for me. work and home. with a couple weeks notice i can go to the grocery store. but that is all i do. i am afraid to go out and get my mail or take out my trash because someone may be out there and i might have to say hi to them. it terrifies me. sometimes it takes me hours to get out the door to get to the store. i swear i feel like if i open the door i will dissolve into ash. i even mail my rent check to the landlady even though her apt is three doors down to drop it off. this started nearly ten years ago and has been getting progressively worse. i have no idea why. i just found out i was DID this year. t would like me to go out and do things but she doesnt push it thank god. i have had panic attacks in her office just because she has said "outside" over and over again and i couldnt handle that. the only time i am safe outside is when i am in my car. so know you are not alone.