Thanks for the replies.

brainhi - Believe me I had tried to drop it. I laid down last night & just couldn't fall asleep. It was after 5 a.m before I finally did. It's ridiculous!

She and I have been together for about 10 years now. Married for roughly 5 of that.

Our lines of communication have almost always been good. Granted, we didn't always see eye to eye but that's ok.. Kept things interesting!

We've had some rough patches before we got married about her behavior w/other guys but nothing we weren't able to smooth over by discussing it. What sticks out in my mind most when I think about this was one day I came home from work (We were engaged at this time) and she was chatting on her laptop with a new guy friend.

She had made plans to meet up w/him already and invited me along. Of course, I agreed - why not? So I asked if she minded if I talked w/him online for a moment or two and she agreed.

When I started typing, I couldn't help but see the previous chat that they had - it was quite long and full of sexual inuendo. I got upset and IMO I was rightfully upset - My fiancee was asking some guy she's never met - but had plans to - who lived only a few miles away from us - what he wanted in a woman they were both discussing sex, openly.

So yeah I never went to go meet that guy and I don't believe my wife did either. We smoothed that over - it took a while but we did.

This is probably the only time I ever really thought that maybe she possessed the ability to cheat on her partner.

Aside from this - sure we've had our ups and downs but it's a marriage - it's not smooth sailing all the time but we make it work because thats what we want.

That being said - If what you say hamster-bamster - is her opinion - and it differs so greatly from mine on a matter that shouldn't be taken so lightly (trust in general) it would seem that we have to talk about it - I feel that I need to.

There are problems in my marriage but from what I know - they're not huge relationship crushing problems.

Even before this conversation yesterday - my biggest issue w/our relationship is lack of communication and intimacy and it's not due to lack of effort.