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Old Dec 11, 2014, 08:05 AM
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gayleggg gayleggg is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2013
Location: Texas
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Quote:
If anyone reading this has experienced getting demoralized with being a care giver, I would appreciate hearing how you handled it. I did speak to a psychologist at the VA not too long ago. She told me that it is not all that unusual for women who are ex-wives or ex-girlfriends to end up doing the major caretaking for men at the end of their lives. This stunned me. I thought my situation was rare, but apparently not. She further told me, that women in my position do tend to get feeling pretty burned out.
I had troubles with this when I had to take care of my dad. After my mom died he needed me but took out all his frustrations on me. Some days I just had to protect myself by stepping back and limiting my time with him. I was his legal guardian so I couldn't back off completely, but I had to back off enough that I could see what he was going through to make him the way he was. The only control he had over his life was by controlling me and when that didn't work he became abusive in his language.

Take time for yourself and don't feel guilty. You can't take care of someone else unless you take care of you. Some space should give you a clearer outlook.

I hope you Christmas goes better than you Thanksgiving.
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Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin

"Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha
Thanks for this!
Rose76