My husband is similar with the finances. I don't agree with his spending. Before marrying him, I was a single mother for 18 years and always paid my bills, if I had to use the credit card to make ends meet, I would always pay it off the next month. My son and I always eat meals from home, only eating at restaurants a couple of times a year while he gets food from restaurants 3 meals a day for his children (his children because he keeps us from being a family, it's him and his kids, me and my son and me and him). He was devastated when filing "his tax return" the first year because it was several thousand less now that we are married - but he doesn't even consider that I used to get a tax refund as well. He's so self centered. I sold my house (losing half the equity I had built up due to the market) so I don't have anywhere to go right now. I have to stay put, because i don't want to burden my parents. I think we will be roommates too. We get along just fine as long as it doesn't have to do with finances or his parenting techniques (he spent the money I gave him -$20k over the past 2 years - on bribery and rewards - it's infuriating). Well I hope you find your way towards your goal of independence.