(Possible trigger) last session we started discussing the few trigger c s a words I managed to write down, for pre exposure therapy and i listened to her say one of the words . We talked about it and processed it some.
She said we would keep discussing it because it's repetative . Anyway since then I feel so vulnerable , I secretly cry over anything, these emotions I can't explain just come up.

I mean, I start to cry because I ran out of a cigarette , or I ran out of milk for my cigarette, then , I stop crying and I feel this rage. Then I calm down.

I feel like an idiot. I never cry OMG , this is one emotion I had under control. I now have to hide and cry. 2 days ago while driving with h to my friends dads house who has dementia kicking in and is an alcoholic, and is drinking again, I had a panic attack.

My h just yelled at me to drink water and it would go away , I couldn't talk. I was trying to catch my breath, that produced stomach cramps, what a mess.

I don't know, panic attack, crying, anger what the hell? I don't see t till Wednesday .