Quote:
Originally Posted by IDK_Anymore
Thank you yumeikui_merry.
You're completely right. I ended this relationship with him 4yrs ago, because I know that I am better off on my own with the way I am.
It's hard for me also though as he's the father of my son, and he's a very good manipulator, telling me that it's good for our son to have us both round!
I just wish I was more assertive to tell him that it doesn't help with him here[emoji17]
xXx
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Ideally a mother and father should be around, that is not something that's disputable. The fact though is that is only with the assumption that the couple is good for each other, provides what is expected to be a healthy environment etc. In lieu of that, it's not necessarily always better to stay together.
I speak from experience. married about 13+ yrs, separated for nearly 4 now (pending divorce), a father of two great boys (and daugther from previous marriage grown and living on her own) The truth is, she should be around them, a realization she's come to recently after nearly 4 yrs being absent. It remains true that the boys would be good to have both of us around but in no way does that say we should be "together". She can be near and see them often enough and have an influence in their lives without being in MY LIFE as a mate. So she will be moving closer but in no way will we ever be back together, the environment of what our marriage was would be detrimental to all in the house.
Again, Ideally, both parents, together ( married or otherwise commited, either way) is great in context of a good loving relationship but his saying it's for the kid and it's best for him is, at best, a manipulation of the truth to get you to let him stay.