hmm... i have fantasies sometimes... i remember that initially i didn't find him particularly good looking even though i found his body type attractive. he gets better looking every day though, i swear! lol.

i don't expect i'll tell him about this for a while...

i'm just starting to fess up to the little kid needy / dependent feelings...

i think i'll give it a while before i fess up about the others.

i think there is a progressive story to be told here... i have some conception of why it is that i have erotic transference to clinicians. i think i'd like to disclose my erotic feelings for him in the context of my understanding of the origins of those feelings. will make it a bit more manageable, i think. also... i am a bit wary of 'polluting' the little kid feelings with this.