I understand how you feel, Hallie. I've had bad depression the past 2 weeks, but didn't feel like cutting. New meds, depression is lifting, but then I get triggered by the idea of going back to work, and it's like I should be proud of myself for doing better and pulling myself out of the depression, but, in the end, the anxiety, the idea of going back to work and having emotional outbursts and flashbacks and dealing with this same pain over and over each day....and all of a sudden there's a razor in my hand and blood on my face.

And I know there are other options. But I choose this one. I know I have the power to stop. But I choose not to. And I hate myself for it. Because it just feeds the trauma and the cycle.

(Huggs)

Seesaw