I also felt like this. What I did to find my now fiance is stop trying. I didn't go places just to meet someone to date. I didn't talk to people only if I wanted to date them. I treated everyone the same way, and if something developed with a friend, or if someone asked me out, it was a pleasant surprise.

Maybe this relates to what hamster was saying. The effortless look. When I stopped trying to impress people, I was just being myself - and I got asked out by multiple people in multiple situations. (I had stopped wearing makeup and stopped trying to dress up nice, or dress up in any extra special way besides for professional situations)

That way, the people I did end up dating were people I had a real connection with. Even if we didn't start out friends, I would have met them somewhere I went because I was interested in it, so they often had the same interest (unlike prior to this change, where I would meet and date people I had nothing in common with, and it was disastrous)

What inspired this? I was tired of the game, like it sounds you are. I didn't have the time and energy to try to dress up and be someone I'm not. And as a result, I've ended up with a great guy who loves me for who I am.