I know how some people who tried to help me must have felt back in the early 2000's. I'm frustrated with a person who has been offered advice and ways out of her situation but stays. She puts no effort forth to escape her "bad life" and get away from her alcoholic abusive parents. And it's to the point now that when someone offers advice they get their head bit off. I'm sorry that we are trying to help you, but you have to want the help first. Until you make an effort nothing can change. I feel bad that I treated my friends the way I did when they wanted to help. Today is just a look back day. Not really good, but not really bad either.