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Originally Posted by Petra5ed
I think the theory is that extreme independence isn't mentally healthy or efficient. That some people have maybe a bad childhood lets say so they never learn to have a safe dependency on anyone. So... again me just talking out of my ***... I think these therapists want to mimic a loving parent figure to get you feeling dependent, which supposedly all humans crave and need for a feeling of connectedness and mutuality... and then to gently push you away because being super dependent isn't cool either. The idea being some day you'll be able to go and feel dependent with someone and have that super connectedness and still be able to walk away and fend for yourself without curling up in a ball, like the so called "secure" adult is.
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One of the things that I don't understand is why therapists don't think that their patients will get to a point where they feel secure enough that they can develop some independence. What it is it about the therapy process or the previous trauma that makes it so that the whole thing has to be manufactured. Can we just no longer go through the process of becoming attached and then feeling secure that we should have been able to go though as children. Does the brain change some how to prevent this, or is the therapy relationship simply to restricted to really prevent this process from occurring.
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Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty in the moonlight overthrew you
She tied you to a kitchen chair
She broke your throne, and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah
--leonard cohen
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