In my situation.....I let it be known exactly WHY I was having issues....at least the things that I understood & KNEW exactly why.....when asked why he did something....for 33 years I was met with the childish answer "I don't know".......& when explaining things there were only so many hundred different ways of trying to explain only to me met with this blank look like I was speaking in a foreign language.

After analyzing it after I left.....I finally understood the cause but it didn't change the fact that I couldn't live like that any longer. One of the last comments I got from him was that "I thought you would continue tolerating me for the rest of our lives".....& "I can't change, it's my personality".....well, taking DBT....it's definitely possible for a NORMAL person to change their personality when they want to & with practice.....but I realized that when dealing with Asperger's.....his statement was correct (basically).

It took more than a slight kick in the *** to even get through to him & even a baseball bat & leaving made no difference with him......he was always in his own world & no one could reach him....but he made himself look normal by doing nice things if he understood it was the right thing to do....otherwise....he was LOST in SPACE. Got so tired of fighting it wasn't worth it any longer & accepting his behavior to have to live with the rest of my life wasn't an option any longer.

Maybe more normal H's who deal with some MI's can be worked with....others.....NOT....after 33 years.....there was no more caring or energy....especially when I started really seeing red every time I had to deal with him. I thought that was just a saying until I really experienced it.