I can't shake this depression. It gets me every single night. I was speaking to my mom like business as usual but inside I'm so unstable. If I increase my anti depressaant I wont feel anything at all, which is worse than this depression. I don't feel human at all when I'm on a regular dosage. It's like I'm a zombie and music doesn't sing to me anymore. It's weird. It's like part of me is lobotomized. I guess I'm fortunate that I don't need such a high dosage.