I hate my family I just hate them . why do I have to be in this miserable Fedup world anyway it sure would be better off without me and a hell of a lot less painful .I am just so expendable again to everyone in my life .I hate the fact that I continually convince myself that i have changed enough for people to no longer see me this way only to be reminded this is not true . idont know if i can do any more. i just am who i am and im expendable i cant change that and i am just tired