For me it's not what T 'gets right' that counts, it's when she's gets things 'wrong'... I asked T why? It's as if I get her to jump so many hoops, but if she fails one, than everything falls apart for me.
T said, it's because things went wrong, more than they went right growing up, so I haven't got any resistance to things going 'wrong', which they do sometimes as people are not perfect, so when T does something that I feels let's me down than all that old stuff gets rehashed.

It's actually a paradox in therapy for me, when we are focused on what's gone wrong and I'm angry in not getting enough, that it actually feels enough.