Thanks for this thready, Partless. I really connect to parables, and I LOVE a good metaphor. My T doesn't use a lot of that stuff, but I love it when she does.

Recently T and I were talking--actually about the very same mother issue you've alluded to above--and said something about me barking up the wrong tree. (OK, it's not an especially elegant metaphor.) But I told her its because I believe she's the only tree. T said "Look around. There are trees everywhere." I realized she's right...that she and my partner and lots of other folks I know have good, strong roots and are beautiful and solid and can "hold" me. Since then I've been reminding myself, when I fall into that habit, that there are lots of trees, and that someday I hope I can be the tree for my daughter, partner and others that they deserve.