I'm new to this site and happened upon it today by chance. I was actually trying to find some advice about how to talk to my daughter about the fact that I've disowned the paternal side of my family.

My history of mental/behavioral symptoms and treatment is long and convoluted but I'll try to summarize as briefly as possible. I've been in and out of therapy since I was 13 (now 37), usually had a diagnosis of depression, still never felt "quite right", and finally got a Bi-Polar II diagnosis about 7 years ago. I've been treated for that off and on w/ therapy and various meds but things still were never quite right. I believe my father's side of the family suffer from some or another mental illness and addiction issues and my father is no exception. He's always been a very heavy drinker, extremely moody, judgmental, absent, and rarely gives praise of any kind. As far as I know he is completely undiagnosed.

I've recently been veering pretty far off the rails again and have sought treatment. I've only had one appointment so far but after reading some things today I think I want to talk to my new therapist about the possibility of either co-morbid BPD or possible misdiagnosis of bi-polar in the first place. So much of the description of BPD fits me, yet it seems that the bi-polar II also fits some times. The BPD symptoms of emotional and interpersonal instability, identity disturbances, intense anger, and impulsiveness all fit me very well. The suicidal and self-harm portions aren't nearly as applicable today as they were 20 years ago but I have experienced those things in my life. Symptoms I thought (and my therapists associated with) bi-polar II now seem like they could also be attributed to BPD. My frequent changes in life plans (starting/stopping jobs, school, etc.) that seemed like hypomania could be the result of "identity disturbances". Perhaps it's just coincidental that I typically feel "down" or "depressed" once the initial "rush" of those experiences is over and I've decided to quit?

I plan to talk to my therapist about all this for sure but if anyone has any further thoughts or insight about the link between bi-polar II and BPD, or the misdiagnosis of one for the other, I'd appreciate hearing about it.

I've always just felt not right and suffer a lot of guilt over my behaviors and actions. I'd like to finally really feel like my diagnosis is accurate and really be able to start working on some effective therapy. I'm finally in a really good place in life....w/ a very loving, supportive husband, have an 8 yr old daughter, and have a decent support network around me, I'd like to finally make some real progress on having a "normal" life. I love the people in my life and want desperately to stop hurting them w/ my moods and behaviors.