Thank you both

I know these things come in waves and I am learning more and more how to allow it all pass. But in the moment it can feel so incredibly overwhelming.

I think because I shared a really difficult part of my history, something I am incredibly ashamed of, with my best friend yesterday also........it really sent me into a spin. It is something that I have only shared with my ex husband, my last closest friend and now my best friend(who I have now known for 3 years).....and it took me at least that long to share with each person. I was terrified that it would change how she feels about me, how any of them would see me.

So today, I feel a bit calmer and have put some of the memories away again. I feel safer. I am anxious in my head(if I allow myself to contemplate it) about the family thing.......but I am determined to live in the moment and try to see the joy rather than dwell on the past.

Easier said than done, but I'll be trying. Having my boy around certainly helps