We have touched on this topic in other posts, and I know it is a tender spot for many of us. I wonder how you handle the phone calls that you may make to your T in between sessions. Do you make the calls? Is it difficult? Does your T respond? Do you ever ask for extra sessions or just to talk? This isn't a checklist, but I was just wondering.

My experience has been (mostly) positive with making contact with T when I need to. I have called on a few occasions when working through something difficult/challenging that I needed his support for. When I call he (usually) calls back within the day. I say usually because twice in the begining of our relationship he didn't call back until the next day but then he was very quick to apologize and say he dropped the ball. I called him on this behavior in session and it hasn't happened again. I have all of his phone numbers (office, cell, home). I never have to go though someone like a receptionist or answering service. I would find that very difficult indeed.

There seem to be three different contexts for my calls. One is right after a session when I am feeling extremely close to some trauma and need to process. It's almost like a delayed reaction from the session. This happened two or three times. The other context is similar but a couple of days later, when I really feel like I can't make it to the next session without contact. I have done this maybe twice. The third context is when I call for an extra session in betwen. I have done this 3 times. Twice my request was met, once it wasn't due to schedule--that felt like a rejection.

When we speak on the phone it feels awkward to me. I have to get myself in the mode of talking to him without the setting of his office or the comfy chair to set the tone. We speak for about 5 or 10 minutes and then he ends the call. It is usually a tremendous help for me to speak with him when I am feeling so disconnected or unsafe in some way. It holds me until our next session.

When i ask for an extra session I do it in the context of his weekend schedule. I know he works some weekends, but not all and if he can, he accommodates me.

When I make the call to him, I suffer while I am waiting for the return call becaue I fully expect at any moment for him to tell me that I am calling too much or he can't accommodate me. I expect him not to be there for me just like my parents were not there for me. It is excruciating.

This morning I called at 7:30 and left a message requesting an extra appointment this weekend. I have been working through some very difficult stuff and feel quite fragile and emotional (a good time for therapy I suppose). I didn't feel like I could make it till Tuesday in one piece. I had no idea whether he would be around or not. He called me back this afternoon and offered me a Sunday appointment. Whew!